Burn out :/
Karachi is burning yet again. The city of lights is quiet and haunting. The rooftop session today was lonesome. I made Chai and decided to sit outside, breathe in some fresh air and erase the crappiness and all the bad news coming in from all sides all day… but to no avail. Even the stars didn’t shine on me tonight. Weird awkwardness in the air. Just as I decided to walk back in, a no-cloud patch appears and Chand Mian shines on me. It’s a full moon night.. Allah Mian? Whats happening?
Take away all the negativity around us. Bring back the stars. I like them shining on me… not hiding like scared twinkles under the clouds. Bring ‘em back I say!
Make things better, please?
Day 1 – Harolds Planet
Harolds Planet should be called ‘GP’s Life’!
I subscribed to Harolds planet a year back I guess and every single time I get an email from them… I tell myself… there is a clone of me who makes these. I relate to them SO well.. its not funny.. its just freaky because whatever is on my mind is on harolds mind too..like facebook asks- whats on your mind just that between me and harold.. we dont ask. Its just there!
Ohkay so i’m celabrating a year of psychic moments with harold! Like really! 
Inspiration? Kahan?
So its been over a month and half since i wrote here. Life’s been on a total roll. The past month went by SO fast that I hardly got time to sit and ‘think’ about it all… you know… Life! The time went by smooth. I travelled to Dhaka, work trip. It was a 10 day trip worth a separate blog post. Came back rushed to Lahore for Hina’s wedding. Lahore trip was one of a kind. Travelling with friends and that too for leisure is always fun. Well it was a first trip for us together and too for a shaadi. Good fun! Amidst all this chaos, Maria surprised us with her wedding proposal and that as soon as we’re back she gets get nikah done. So yess!!! Life was on a roll.
Now on the work front, GPCS has been on a roll as well Alhamdolillah. SAARC mela with Choti and Amy went by great. I think the idea of sharing a stall was good. I didn’t really have time to prepare on a larger scale anyways. And Amy and Choti turned out to be great companions
Buttt…. I need my mojo back. I need my inspiration back. I need an owl nighter… I’m working but I feel something is missing… that spark… that moment.. where I tell myself.. WHAT A WOW-er that was!
Overall, it has been okay okay, Alhamdollillah.
Allah Mian? Soo? Whats up?
Ps: I see a tunnel
And I see light at the end of it
I need to get there…soon.
2011.. already?
This new years eve.. i didnt do anything “exciting” at all. I sat outside.. rooftopped a little while.. then was told by a dear friend that it wouldnt be safe to stay outside with flying bullets around.. so i came back in. I wasnt excited.. i had a rush of thoughts that came to my mind. Questions that needed answers. I thought to myself.. another year passed..did i achieve much? or for that matter did i achieve anything at all?
Well 2010 was very happening. With good and beautiful things came in the bad and ugly!
The year started off happy with a goal to save money. This had to be the year of savings. Work life got busy. SAARC mela.Thanking Allah mian. I admired things around me. Gave them attention. My 24th birthday was celebrated several times in the most special manner with my most special people. MJ and the flushed peace! India trip- a trip of a lifetime with the students. Delhi and Kolkatta! More travelling. Thar. Independent teaching and travelling. more responsibility. Got my own domain as a birthday present. 13AM. The rooftop became more special. Its become my escapade now. Some chinngum songs. Did a very special project for Photographics.The Summer break. Bonding. Endless chai and coffee sessions, popcorns. chairman mao. Half the year went by quick.
The 2nd half literally RAN as if it were in a race to get to the finish line…the finish line of 2010. Some friends got engaged.. some married.. some broke up. All these stories around me made me a stronger person. My faith high..Thankyou Allah mian. Someone elses happiness was bound to become my own… endless hugs. love. new friends…friends becoming close friends.. close friends becoming closer..sisterly bonds increasing. Saxaphone and the post midnight crackpottiness. My new phone. Nokia 6760. My goal- resolution for 2010 was to get myself a DSLR and i did. 2010 did turn out to be the year of savings. Alhamdolillah.
Ghazal Pirzada Creative Studios taking a new dimension for the world. Facebook page, exhibitions. Sparkles. Allah mians plan for me. My endless special prayers and continuous series of questions. good times. bad times. arguments and fights. Swallowing down anger.. trying to be a better person and succeeding as well. More people walking in and less people walking out =) Being best friends with mahnoor and enjoying mehru’s childhood. Photographing. PS and AI courses and scoring the highest! Well Yes.. lots of achievements. My first batch of students.. graduated with tears of joy! Random people praising my efforts and acknowledging me. The feeling of being blessed and praying for everyones behtari.
Its been a roller coaster ride..lots of memories to treasure for life… good and bad.
2011 came just too early. Allah mian make this year the best of years for me
and accept all those special prayers i make for them special people in my life.
Raah Pay Kante Bikhre agar, Uspay to phir bhi chalna he hai,
Shaam Chhupalay Suraj magar, Raat ko ek din Dhalna he hai,
Rut ye tal jayegi, Himmat rang layegi,
Subha phir aayegi
2011! u better be good.
Resolution:
Save more money. Bring the gullak to good use!
Be a better person.
GP can(t) dance saala ;)
Well, dancing is something everyone can do. Its just a matter of doing it in front of people or when no ones watching. I can dance when no ones watching and just a few days back I realized I AM actually shy when it comes to dancing with someone. I’ve danced or rather done a simple luddi with a bunch of friends but a one on one…. I AM SHY.
*skittle red cheeks*
I’ve been on a high for the past 2 days. With no internet at home for 20 days or so.. the workplace with OVER loads of work… am a little sleep-deprived and HIGH! Funny mode ON! Been bugging friends and colleagues at workplace. Lifes good
*TwwwirrrRrrrrlll*
untie the knot..
Bad bad gut feeling.. weird knot in the tummy.
The heart feels burdened with a reason mostly unknown, probably known.
I am a person who is good with handling a thin count of threads and patient enough to solve the knotted puzzled chemistry of the threads… Why is it soo tough to untie the knot in the tummy?
*sigh*
Gut feeling.. You bad bad gut feeling.. GO AWAY!
Please? :$
Randomly-21042010
Randomly 21042010 technically 01032010-31032010
-Latest addiction – reading before sleeping which makes me NOT sleep on time.
-My birthday 2010 was celebrated several times with the best of friends I’ve ever had. Love them all to bits.
-Lots of traveling happened this march which eventually resulted in over exhaustion but great experiences to treasure for life.
-Shared a room with choti for 4 days as a teacher and had moments where we found lying right beside one another with pin drop silence. *comforting*
-I have the best brothers. Love them!
-This birthday a dream came true and died within 36 hours.
-Right and wrong are opposites.
-Moving on and letting things go are total strangers
-A new friend of friend is now a friend [party]
-I got a flat-wide-screen monitor
-Lifes not at its best at the moment probably but its gives me a feeling of content. On second thought, this might just be the best of what life has to offer.
-I did not keep my promise. I still visit canon.com almost everyday… I guess I’ll do the same till I buy my own dslr.
-I don’t get a craving for chocolate anymore as much as I crave photography
-I got my own domain as my birthday present this year <3 Ada & Mayg api
-I thought all my wisdoms were out just till yesterday when I ended up with a swollen gum and the teeth popping out *hurts*
-I like these kind of random posts
-Nani’s smile made my day and I know for a fact that i made her day too
-I would adopt Hero and buddy M if I could.
-People from your past can be weird
-Oreo.High was a moment treasured for life
-Lots of chinngum songs these days- Bachana-SKZ-iktara-kedaar-if you’re gone
-Some people are possessive about some people.
-I.repeat – AD and shammy are crazy
-Jkj’s mean more than they ever did
-I listen. I convince. I hug. I smile. I pray. For behtari.
-And I have a huge smile on my face for a reason only I know!!! Muahahaa!! =D
from right to wrong.
There are So many things i dont agree to while the others do…
Am i right or are they right?
Who’s right? who’s wrong?
Is it my way of dealing with things that allows me to say that a certain thing is right or wrong? or… is it my upbringing that backs my way of looking at things differently from others.
Laikin matlab kyaaaaa.aaaaaaa???
The summer breeze =)
The meaning of a true sunday came back for me today. I dont even recall the last time i had a real sunday. Life’s been super busy lately and thats how i like it to be but you know.. at times.. one needs a break. There is a life update pending but at the moment am tooo mesmerized but the very beautiful evening i experienced.
The clouds were at a high today. All fluffy, happy and runny yet they curled up together with one another giving away these happy positive vibes that i caught on to. I missed not having my camera the mossst today (camera amazing stories shall roll later) but i guess what my eyes beheld from today, only 20 percent of the same would have been captured by the man-made instrument aka the camera.
I knew that the sunset would be a beauty today, so i prayed maghrib as soon as i heard the azaan and ran off to the rooftop. And not so much of a surprise, the sunset was just amazing. The fluffs remained grey for a while and the sky at the back turning chrome yellow. Slowly steadily it turned around to be orange and the fluffs absorbed the streaks of pink.. The rest of the sky went dark and the traffic signal lights and the cars rushing by had more meaning by becoming visible. I sat at the top ledge of the rooftop, my legs hanging in midair, winds rushing through my hair (how i love my short hair for that).
Took my doodle diary with me in the hope that i would write something down or probably sketch something out but what i felt couldnt be penned down hence i let the doodle diary be and indulged in some free thinking enjoying the cool summer breeze.
Welcoming the summers, alhamdolillah.
Dear life, I am back
Ps: A sunday should be a sunday for loadshedding!
|blocked|
Words don’t flow. They don’t talk. They don’t bother, well at times they do. They sit inside of you patiently waiting for ideas to rescue them. Ideas that can lend them purpose. A writer’s block is almost always the absence of the perfect idea for the words to borrow meaning from and to be set free.
Thats my current state of mind. Want to blurt it out but just cant express whats been meshing day and night.
=|
Color of the day: Orange!
Blessed!
Its amazing how just an hour and a half of a gappay session with a friend can truly make up for a crappy day. Phew! I haven’t laughed so much in ages. *you’re Precious*
After waiting for more than 3 weeks or so got to watch 3 idiots on big screen, we finally made it today. It was worth the wait i’d say. AMAZING movie. One movie that actually made me cry and Laugh at the same time. And we walked out all happy and satisfied that the wait had ended. Thanx Zainu, bought back great memories to treasure for life
A Tuesday well Spent! =)
*f.r.i.e.n.d.s*
At times one needs just ‘one’ friend to spend quality time with.
o. Plan to go for a movie with a friend on a saturday and for the next 2 hours you end up at a nearby mall because the house full saturday was just NOT for you. Nonetheless, time well spent with some book shopping and bonding, rare of its kind.
o. A friend comes over and with them you inaugurate the new frother you got. With lots of fun and LOTS of things to talk about, you LEARN how to use the frother.
o. The ‘smiley face’ and the ‘starry night’ meet.
o. Just 10 mins of a heart to heart session at workplace with C can make my day.
o. A very old friend, back from college calls just to ask how i am doing. Feels great. Thanx AK.
o. Making new friends has never been difficult for me but most of them just wipe their feet away and leave. I hope this new friend stays.
o. Mothers can be your best friends IF you give them a chance.
o. There are just a few people i can REALLY call friends and i absolutely LOVE all of them!
Blessed i be =)
Tomorrow
the pink fluffs…
the birds clutter the sky
the orange sphere prepares to leave
changing hues
from orange to red to pink and gone…
the pink fluffs turn to orange and peach and dark
while the jet leaves a fluffy trail
across the skyline
with every setting sun
my heart deepens, darkens, saddens…
but
what brings me back
is the hope
for a better tomorrow.
*lonely…quiet…*
Lately, my sleep is gone to wonderland, leaving me ‘not-s0-sleepy’ most of the time. Well this isnt that great becaaaaause routine goes haywire and that leads to a lot of other issues BUT on the other hand these sleepless nights give me time to think, re-think, doodle AND click.
So last night, i just couldnt sleep. My window gives me the most beautiful view, 2am, the city sleeps, i overlook the bridge that flies over the clifton bridge. Its quiet, the moon shines, the stars smile sparkle, I walk out to the rooftop with my camera…
..it was windy.. quiet… lonely…i loved my camera for giving me company.. on a lonely quiet night…
*sigh*
*Wish-01112009*
Oonchi zameen, uss peh oonchay makaan
Aur oonchay hain log; oonchay khayaal
Par neecha hai dil, aur neecha imaan
Aur neecha zameer;
Uss pe oonchee yeh shaan!
*Realization-28102009*
At times, being content kills you. Its a beautiful feeling most of the time BUT at times it kills you, frustrates you, bothers you and *hurts* you.
Does keeping your faith high over things will take to your destination or prayers will or working hard over it will or just leave it to Allah mian and wait or WHAT?
I realize a lot of things… i realize high hopes *hurt*
they’ve hurt in the past and they hurt now too… i dont learn..
I realize… *sigh*
Wish-03102009
Wish i could just let things out and not make ‘em bother me.
Though they fade away… But they leave a mark.
*sigh*
*He, heard me out*
Allah Mian hears me out and i get what i ask for. Alhamdolillah such a great feeling… everything falls into place.
Last night, although i was freakishly sleepy since was up for more than 24 hours for the record, I had to spend sometime outside at the rooftop, admire my stars and Thank Allah Mian for the blessings. I was sleepy but couldn’t sleep, I *sigh* and wonder where all the stars and chaand khan are, here comes an aich em aich saying the same. I was so glad S noticed the same, i promised that i’d be in bed in another 15 minutes, the sky was red, absolutely beautiful cloud cover, no chaaand khan to be scene and no stars.
I wish for stars to show up, i love stars *sigh* and to my surprise i see a no cloud patch appearing and one star sparkles at me. Blessed i be!
The clock strikes 1, 15 minutes are over, i keep my promise and hit bed. lied down for another hour or so till a dreamless night look over.
Ps: did i say i love stars??
realization 01062009
Off a drumming fraanship and being ‘differently alike’
Heres to a lot of good times to come.
*good friends are blessings*
DrRrrrumm Ittt!!!
*i feel, i stare…*
Most of the times, i want to go to the beach and just sit there idle. Watch the waves crash by my feet, stare at the sea and the feeling of being so small in front of Allah. When i’m at the beach, i feel close to Allah, i feel His presence the most!
But recently I’ve started feeling the same when i stare at the sky, at night, and when i see stars i’m the most happiest person alive…starry nights *sigh*
