Mr. Chand Khan ;)

Rozay Wali Eid 2012

This year Ramzan just ran full speed. Seems like just yesterday that taraweeh started and the first sehri happened. Alhamdolillah, ramzan gone by, availed in the best possible way i could.

I made lots of prayers this ramzan, availed all the big nights*allah shukr*. Of upcoming new beginnings in life, i was bugged a lot this ramzan with ‘last ramzan at home, next year with hubby?’. It was a mix of feelings, totally looking forward to the new change in life, while i felt ammi’s voice go shaky. A random burst of emotions from the parents collectively, a t-shirt project with saad for independence day and crazy wakeup calls. This ramzan has been a big learning experience. A friends dad passed away on Jumat-ul-Widah, the last precious friday of the holy month. He was lucky enough to be buried in the holy land aka Makkah. It shook me. Ive been hearing of his health going down. May allah mian give the family sabr. Ameen.

A skype date with ada and family is a total must on Eid. With manoo and mehru jumping around in Eid attire with mehendi stories to share. Sooo much fun 🙂

The most happiest FAQ this ramzan was,’EIDI aaiygi is saal?*wink wink*’. hahahaaa… yes, the other set of parents, the inlaws bought my clothes for eid with chooriyaan and shoes. Alhamdolillah such a good feeling. Eid was different this time. Amidst running around meeting relatives, hubby-to-be came over to meet us while we went to meet the inlaws too. The bestest newest feeling, receiving Eidi from MIL and Hubby-to-be 🙂

With everyones blessings, looking forward to the big change in life 🙂
Allah mian Thankyouu, im loving this plan of yours.

Missed the rooftop the most, caught a glimpse of chand mian on Eid day 2. sigh. Good times those were. *throws confetti* just because missing good times is celebratory enough 🙂

long lost friend

Apologies for being totally out of the loop. So much has happened in the past 2 months that im overloaded with thoughts and ideas and the likes. need to update this journal of life on.a.serious note. Last night was weird.Brain overload.hateful feeling.blurry vision.winds blowing.mosquitoes biting.uneasy.knot in the throat.heart-calming phone call.chand mian popping up, proving that YES there is a connection.broken sleep.early mode on.

On a happier note, talking things out helps. Always.
Allah Mian, Thankyou for being SO meherbaan on us always.

Burn out :/

Karachi is burning yet again. The city of lights is quiet and haunting. The rooftop session today was lonesome. I made Chai and decided to sit outside, breathe in some fresh air and erase the crappiness and all the bad news coming in from all sides all day… but to no avail. Even the stars didn’t shine on me tonight. Weird awkwardness in the air. Just as I decided to walk back in, a no-cloud patch appears and Chand Mian shines on me. It’s a full moon night.. Allah Mian? Whats happening?
Take away all the negativity around us. Bring back the stars. I like them shining on me… not hiding like scared twinkles under the clouds. Bring ‘em back I say!
Make things better, please?

The hopeless Optimist!

If you know me well, you’d know that I’m a hopeless Optimist. I use the term hopeless because my faith doesnt die. I’m hopeless like that! 😀 New way to look at the term hopeless … nai? I’m the one who sees good in things that are bad for most. I see ‘Behtari’. I’m optimistic about life in all. I use the term…’koi baat nai’ all the time. Most people aren’t too convinced with it. I don’t use the word [hate] but rather ‘dislike’. You just can’t hate anything/anyone. Dislike is more like it 🙂

Mr Wiki says optimism is “Hopefulness and confidence about the future or successful outcome of something; a tendency to take a favorable or hopeful view”.

I found this image online and I could relate to it SO well because I actually did something similar. I bought a backpack [laptop bag] in anticipation. Yes, I am saving up for a laptop. So the bag came in first and because of the bag only… the laptop will come soon! 😀 Inshallah!

Last year was my year of savings for a DSLR. I had been saving for over 2 years, but I had a goal, a vision towards the DSLR. My target was a camera that I used at workplace… but as soon as i had enough money for it… Canon had come up with 3 new cameras. There was a moment of ‘steadddddyyyyyyy’. I waited a couple of months more and saved up for the best DSLR available in my budget and bought it!

The same way… will get me a laptop sooner than soon. My optimism has brought me where I am today. I do get a little a demotivated at times… after all I be human. But I have precious people who bring me back!

‘Faith in God, includes faith in His timing’ – Neal A.Maxwell

So yess…Faith high, up in the sky[where the birds fly and the beautiful chaand mian resides with sparkly stars].

For whatever is bestt and behtar! Patience prevails and my question remains. Allah mian? *giggles*

Day 2 – The rooftop

Anyone who knows me well, would know that i am inspired by nature… the sky. the clouds. the stars. the sun. THE chand mian 🙂
Being blessed with the most beautiful rooftop one can have in the city of chaos… is a Charm. I can spend an entire night sitting outside my apartment and enjoy the thandii hawaainat the rooftop. open skies. cars passing by. birds flying by. sparkling stars. charming Chand mian. the fresh air that gives you goosebumps. the traffic signal lights that always intrigue me. racing bikers. struggling rickshaws. Sigh.

Sometimes i capture the most beautiful scenery where i see rumbling skies, strokes from nature that only Allah Mian can create. My faith high… i sit there.. sometimes clicking pictures of what i see.. at other times i find myself mesmerized by what i see that i forget to click.

The rooftop is an inspiration for me, i’ve spent countless owl nights swinging by the jhoola. When kesc decides to take away the luxury, i run to the rooftop Check more work inspired by the rooftop here.

Just one of those days…

Colder feet, coldest fingers
Hours of Fun, Time ran fast
Mahnoors 5th birthday and her shrieking voice.
Excitement to its highest level! *duas*
Random phone calls
Random-est photography session
Smiles. Laughter. Chefs special Pizza
Duas Qubooled.
Allah Mian IS listening ❤ Awesome! *u know who u are*
Skittles and sparkles
Hugs and love and prayers
The stars shine brighter than any other day
The positive energy wraps me around itself
Tickle cells active more than ever
Allah mian! Whats the plan 😀


Just last night i indulged myself in some ME time. I’d say though i have some time off from school aka a winter break i havent really given time to myself, my thoughts… in other words the much required ‘me time’. So i stepped outside.. the cold winds.. the traffic.. the darkness..My Chand mian… the stars.. everything was the same..the rooftop seemed lonely.. I hadnt really spent time there. I climbed the real rooftop(yes i am very daring that way) sat there for an hour or so..hummed a few songs..chilled.
I kept thinking..whts this life all about? Why am i working so hard.. that i’m not being able to give time to myself. Not that i’m complaining but just thinking aloud. Later i sat on the jhoola.. swinging.. back and forth.. back and forth..I clicked a few pictures. Enjoyed holding my OWN camera. Its a feeling only I know…the sense of achievement 🙂 Alhamdolillah!
Thanking Allah Mian at every step of life. Creating new stuff..Life’s good.
Looking forward to the new year.. new beginnings.. new goals.. new deadlines.
but but.. Allah Mian.. Whats the plan? 😉

Chaand mian

I love Chaand Mian. Now there are SO many things that come to my mind as i see chand mian. Lifes been great.. Allah Mian has been mehrbaan. So the journey of admiring chaand mian continues… From being J to P =)
The thought makes me smile *blessed*

Jhoom..poori raat jhoom, gol gol ghooom…jab hum tum saath hon
Jhoom..saari dunya jhoom..maray pyaar say..
Sab kuch hai teray liyayy…
Yeh pyaar ka.. pyaar ka jaadu

Ramadan 2010

This year, Ramadan has been great Alhamdolillah.
Allah Mian has been Gracious as always.
Feeling content and blessed.
Most of the time has been availed praying hard.
The best of all feelings, prayers have been answered 😀
Faith has been high, a little higher than before.
Prayers. Positive vibes. Beautiful most chand mian.
Falling ill. Random flowers.
Random love. Random possessive-ness.
Life’s Good. *blessed*

*Life swings*

…The swing goes forward and backward. Forward and backward. There is silence. All you hear are squeaks from the hooks of the swing *chee(n) chee(n)*. They’re almost fit on the swing. No extra space for anyone else. Finally they find a way to sit in a comfortable position, hand in hand rather arm in arm. They look at opposite sides. Forward and backward. Forward and backward. It goes fast. Fast enough for the winds to hit them. Happy winds. They talk about anything and everything that comes their way. Poke. Poke. Poke. She glares at chand mian. He states that chand mians winking, he’s a flirt. She asks him if he’s jealous. He says, yes a little. She smiles. Theres silence. Forward and backward. Forward and backward. Tickle. Poke. Tickle. Poke. Massage. Sleepyheads. Forward and backward. Forward and backward. The phone rings. Let it ring. He takes a name. She wants to get off the swing. He doesnt let her. NAI! Bhao! She cant help but laugh. They smile. Forward and backward. The swing does them happy. Very happy. Theres silence. Its comforting. Time flies. Its time to go home. Forward and backward. Life goes on…

The summer breeze =)

The meaning of a true sunday came back for me today. I dont even recall the last time i had a real sunday. Life’s been super busy lately and thats how i like it to be but you know.. at times.. one needs a break. There is a life update pending but at the moment am tooo mesmerized but the very beautiful evening i experienced.

The clouds were at a high today. All fluffy, happy and runny yet they curled up together with one another giving away these happy positive vibes that i caught on to. I missed not having my camera the mossst today (camera amazing stories shall roll later) but i guess what my eyes beheld from today, only 20 percent of the same would have been captured by the man-made instrument aka the camera.

I knew that the sunset would be a beauty today, so i prayed maghrib as soon as i heard the azaan and ran off to the rooftop. And not so much of a surprise, the sunset was just amazing. The fluffs remained grey for a while and the sky at the back turning chrome yellow. Slowly steadily it turned around to be orange and the fluffs absorbed the streaks of pink.. The rest of the sky went dark and the traffic signal lights and the cars rushing by had more meaning by becoming visible. I sat at the top ledge of the rooftop, my legs hanging in midair, winds rushing through my hair (how i love my short hair for that).

Took my doodle diary with me in the hope that i would write something down or probably sketch something out but what i felt couldnt be penned down hence i let the doodle diary be and indulged in some free thinking enjoying the cool summer breeze.

Welcoming the summers, alhamdolillah.
Dear life, I am back 🙂

Ps: A sunday should be a sunday for loadshedding!

Happy 2010!

So yea..Its flashback time, a little*just a little* late but yea… for the record.

The Year 2009, the year when life changed for the better, bigger experiences came in, a lot of laughter and happiness revailed, new members in the family were inducted, new friends were made for life, bonding sessions that meant the most and will last forever =)

Looking back, it all started great Alhamdolillah. I was soooo looking forward to 2009 with faith high, up in the sky. Saad started FY at Indus and with it my 2nd year at work started, Abida Parveen- Live in concert, largest event at Indus organized, 23rd birthday, first International trip as faculty to ‘Thailand’ with my best friends as students, early april Dadi passed away, Basant happened at school and later came an opportunity to manage a band, joined [NO IDEA] as manager for 6 months, New friends came into being; Boo, AD and Amy, Choti’s birthday happened which was magical for her =)

Pakistan sign language(PSL) certification, lots of cake treats and bonding sessions, Sidrah got married, doodling came into existence for me, roof-topping, chocolates, more photography, one on one with Allah Mian, admiring the sunsets more, starry nights and casanova Mr Chand Mian, voice of the dying horse… trips back home, gullak money, birthdays made special, hero-Buddy M-Best friend, my junior lot-best friends-hero and buddy M gang graduated, -‘Dost’- happened, I became Phupo once again to a beautiful niece ‘Mehr Fatima’, also became Khala to my handsome nephew ‘Raaif’, Bibi passed away(no more dua wali candies) but lots of prayers remained, Maria got nikahofied, heart to heart sessions, photography competitions, barbies, Alumni show, found my ‘Real Unbiological Sister’ this year, prayed more, hopes were high, faith was higher, ended with a full moon and a happy person photo shoot with chotaaay.

All in all, a fantastic-happening-happy-year, Welcoming the new year with open arms with prayers and faith n patience to cope up with all the tough times life has to offer and cherish all the good times for years to come. Inshallah. Ameen.

Happy 2010 folks!

Resolution 2010:
-be a better person
-get DSLR =)



bridge-OWL mode

Lately, my sleep is gone to wonderland, leaving me ‘not-s0-sleepy’ most of the time. Well this isnt that great becaaaaause routine goes haywire and that leads to a lot of other issues BUT on the other hand these sleepless nights give me time to think, re-think, doodle AND click.

So last night, i just couldnt sleep. My window gives me the most beautiful view, 2am, the city sleeps, i overlook the bridge that flies over the clifton bridge. Its quiet, the moon shines, the stars smile sparkle, I walk out to the rooftop with my camera… was windy.. quiet… lonely…i loved my camera for giving me company.. on a lonely quiet night…

*I Admit…*

I admit…
I admit…I am patient, very patient
I admit I need to learn a few (more) things in life and I am learning, its just that its taking a little while…
I admit I love my friends, my people and would do anything for them…
I do things without thinking of what it will give me in return… be it doing things for people around me… or otherwise..
I admit I don’t do things for a reason; there is no reason for me to be there for someone…just that I’d want to be there for them…
I admit I will never confess if I have feelings for someone…I’d be scared to loose the friend in them
I’d wait for things to happen my way with whatever is best for me that has already been written
I admit I don’t like to fight; hence there are no regrets…
I just wish that no one has any regrets in life… simply because they hurt…
I admit YET AGAIN that I love stars and the moon… they make me happy… really happy…the rooftop is a blessing
I also admit that relationships mean A LOT to me sooo getting married would be a beautiful thing to happen
I admit, my faith is high, up in the sky
I strongly believe in whatever happens happens for a reason; be it good or bad…there is always a reason…
I admit I have a new chingum song I relate to so well… it is called ‘ooncha’ by noori
I admit life seems good at the moment, wish for it to be better tomorrow…
I admit moving on is the most difficult thing to do, but once you do you will definitely feel a huge burden off you, life will be clearer, you’ll see behtari in whatever happened.
I admit I think too much, but that’s the kind of freedom I have, the freedom to think…
I admit i cant sit idle to save my life…
I doodle…
I admit I have a list of things I want and I have a feeling I will get ‘em when the time is right…Inshallah!


*Realization 05102009*

Though am reallly Happy to be on the giving end Most of the time, BUT its an absolutely amazing feeling to be on the receiving end once in a while =)

*The word not to be worded; is worded*

I sayyy… Life is Good… after all my faith is high, UP in the sky; Where the beautiful Mr Chand Khan resides 🙂
Thank You Allah Mian *sigh*